I know, I seem to be only posting every other month these days. Only when I have something on my mind or my heart. Bear with me, one day I won't have things that I feel you "need" to hear. Right now though it seems that life lessons are all I've got and like it or not you must need to hear them too, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this right now.
Another season in our lives is winding down. I can honestly say that while I haven't enjoyed learning the lessons we have learned, I do feel as though we have come out stronger and tougher and more loving and more appreciative. I don't think I will ever understand why there will not be another baby Harlow joining our family this Fall. I don't understand why the Lord continuously surrounds me with pregnant women. I don't know why we are not pregnant again. What I do know is that we have 2 healthy children who absolutely are a joy to be around. I do know that I have the opportunity to take a trip to Germany to visit my husband, a trip I would not have taken had I been 6 months pregnant. I do know that I have had the opportunity to work at several Half Marathons and serve others while helping to raise money for charities. Charities that make a difference in the lives of those whom I am close too. Half Marathons that I would have been running had I not miscarried 3 weeks before the series started. I do know that God is Good and while His plans are not our own, His plans are good.
During this past season in time, I have become increasingly thankful for my healthy little ones. Losing a baby has reminded me that life is precious and life is not a guarantee. I have several friends with little ones who are not so healthy and I have seen them struggle (both in person and from afar), yet always keep their faith. For me, seeing this example of love has led me to re-think my relationships with my own children and my relationship with the Lord. Do I make the conscious effort to praise him in the hard times just like I praise him in the good times. I my relationship with my children I want to be present, I want to be grateful, I want to make others feel and know they are loved and cherished. I want to be an example of love so that they in turn know how to love others.
Held By Natalie Grant
Two months is too little, they let him go
They had no sudden healing
To
think that providence
Would take a child from his mother
While she prays,
is appalling
Who told us we'd be rescued
What has changed and
Why
should we be saved from nightmares
We?re asking why this happens to
us
Who have died to live, it's unfair
This is what it means to be
held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you
survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise
was that when everything fell
We?d be held
This hand is
bitterness
We want to taste it and
Let the hatred numb our sorrows
The
wise hand opens slowly
To lilies of the valley and tomorrow
This is
what it means to be held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your
life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved and to
know
That the promise was that when everything fell
We?d be held
If
hope if born of suffering
If this is only the beginning
Can we not wait
for one hour
Watching for our Savior
This is what it means to be
held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life
And you
survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise
was that when everything fell
We'd be held
