Adventures in Roller Coaster Riding (the emotional kind!)

So here we are! We have been through the ups and downs of what one affectionately calls deployment life and we are at the end.......oh, but wait. You just THOUGHT we were at the end. Remember, we have talked over and over again about the word "change," that seems to go hand in hand with this life-style. Yes, that one word when uttered in front of the military spouse has such power and control that it usually renders her speechless. In our life,a military member can often come home from work at any random time and say that dreaded word and his or her spouse instantly knows that life is about to shift directions. It's not always bad, and we know to expect it, but for anyone "change," can be difficult.

For us, our "deployment adventure" start date was constantly changing, so I should have known to expect the end of the deployment return date changing too!!  During a deployment, the one constant that the spouse hangs onto is a return.  Not that it always happens, there are many who do not get the privilege of having that reunion. There are several of those husband-less spouses here in Jacksonville.   It is a reminder that not everyone comes home, and for me after I had my own insignificant pity party they have been on my heart in these last few hours.

So my fantastic husband was supposed to return home to us 2 days ago, well at least that is what we thought and what we were hoping for.  The date got moved back 24 hours, and then 20 hours before we were supposed to leave to go wait to pick him up, we found out that they were going to be delayed several days.  D.A.Y.S..........geeze that is a long word, especially when you have been waiting  months.  By this time the house was clean, the laundry was done, we had food (good food I might add) in the pantry, the sheets had been changed and the kids, well, they had eaten all but one of our "count-down kisses."  We were ready!  And so it is life and the struggles that come with it...How do you not cry?  How are you not disappointed?  How are you not frustrated?  You are, and it is ok........Seriously, if there is one thing we know, it is that it will change!!

And this brings to me the point I am now at after the serious pity party I had yesterday.  I did get a new Keurig out of it and I am super excited about it, so it was a good party!  If you are going to throw one it might as well be a good one!!    I can say that unless you have been through a deployment personally, it's probably not a good idea to give advice, or say encouraging things when you have a friend or family member who is dealing with a delayed return.  We know you mean well, but it comes off as superficial platitudes.  I love my friends and family dearly, but saying things like......."He will be home soon!" or "What's a few more days!" or any other positive words is not really a good idea, I promise you will get funny looks or they may let your next call go to voicemail! I'm just being honest, and if you think about it, I'm sure you get it too.  It just plain sucks, and saying much more than that seems very trivial.  I know that the reason for the delay is way beyond the control of anyone.  God controls the weather and unfortunately, bad weather can cause delays.  Or things break, there is not necessarily a reason they just do!  I know this already.  Knowing these things does not make it better or even easier.  Not everyone gets to come home. I am grateful. I am thankful. I am blessed. I know that things could have been different. I know that my children do get to welcome home their Daddy in the next few days.  These are the things I hold onto, the things that get me through the last few days.

The kids are excited.  Well, J is.  He totally gets it that Daddy will be home soon.  He was concerned when he figured out I added more kisses.  He is more than happy to eat them, but he's a smart kid and he remembered when we were not supposed to have any more in the jar!  CB has no clue and no sense of time.  We are thankful for Skype.  That bit of technology has been so helpful in creating a relationship with her Daddy.  She will at least know what he looks and sounds like.  Yes, she is his princess.

So, I'm sure you are wondering where are we at now in the process.  Well, we got good news and we have another date and even a time.  We will see.......this time I am a little more cautious.  No one likes to add more Hershey Kisses to the count-down!!